3.12.2024

Keeping My Promise

 5 1/2 years ago, I made a big promise to God.  We were preparing to move across the country, and I was absolutely terrified.  I was struggling with so much depression, and the thought of leaving my support group behind, the people who knew the "real me" without depression because they had seen the sudden transformation within me from productive to often debilitated, was overwhelming.  As the move came closer and as my fear grew stronger, I told God that if He would give me people who would love, support, understand, and care about me through my darkness, then I would do EVERYTHING in my power to use my struggles for good.  God has definitely kept His end of our promise, so I am trying my very best to keep mine.

A few days ago, Lora Barajas told me about a big display going up in Salt Lake City, Utah featuring unique service opportunities being done around the world to lift and bless others.  She suggested that I submit my Christmas Socks for Hope project.  Anytime these opportunities come up, I remember my promise to God and feel compelled to try, even if it doesn't end up going anywhere.  

For the last several days, I worked to gather the necessary parts for my application, including pictures that someone took from a big service event last year that I didn't know about and were exactly what I needed (such a huge tender mercy), and officially submitted it this morning.  Like I said, I don't know if this will go anywhere.  I'm sure there will be so many applications, so the chance of mine being chosen is probably very slim, but at least I can tell myself that I did my part and the rest will work out however it is supposed to.  

Every time something like this happens, I am once again humbled to see what God can do with brokenness.  How He can make beauty from ashes.  How He has given me the most incredible people to help me when I've needed it and the most amazing opportunities to spread the light and hope and love He has for each person.  How He has taught me the value of each individual life and has lit a fire in me to try to show that to others, especially those who are fighting through their darkest hour.  I'm just so so thankful.  I'm especially thankful for all the support that makes this project possible each year as I could never do it on my own.  Life is a beautiful gift, and I'm beyond thankful to be on the end where I can see and feel that for myself again.

1.12.2024

Swimming

 This -4 degree weather has got nothing on me, the wimpiest of all wimps in the cold. πŸ₯ΆπŸ˜œ Why?  Because I *have* to prioritize my mental health, and there's not just one magical thing that keeps me in a good place.  For me, there's medication, counseling, good sleep, healthy eating, drinking enough, getting out of the house, spending time with good people, and very importantly, exercising.  Going swimming is non-negotiable for me (except for circumstances like sickness or things of that nature).  It breathes life into my soul when I feel weighed down by the heaviness of darkness and sorrow.  Too much time without it and I can feel a physical difference inside my body.  The gym has become a happy place for me, and I'm so so thankful for the warmth and indoor pool it provides that allows me to keep swimming even when it's frigid and quite honestly miserable outside.

#JustKeepSwimming 

#WorkingForHappiness 

#NoMoreGoingOutToday