When life throws me down, the first battle is choosing to take some little step to get back up. That first step is always the hardest, as the others seem to somehow follow once I can find the strength to begin trying to live again. Often times, this new beginning comes in being intentional about looking for things that make me smile. Here were some of mine for the week:
--Brooklyn and Garrett each saying the cutest little things, like Brooklyn telling me that she likes how preying mantis arms look like tacos and Garrett wrapping his blanket around his head and telling all of us that he is Santa now. 😍😂
--Making some crayon art with my kids and then having to google how to get melted wax out of... well... everything. We had fun 🤷♀️🙈
--Kyle and I both realizing that the only reason we planted green beans in our garden was because we thought the other one wanted them. Now we have lots of green beans and neither of us really want to eat them 😂
--Showing up to a church activity and matching shirts with the cutest little baby to snuggle. 😍
--Being in my young women class at church last Sunday and doing our usual going around and saying how our week was. I was first. I said, "My week was... greatttt" in a slightly sarcastic tone. We all laughed and it was so nice to be able to feel safe in that space and to be able to find humor even in struggle.
--Looking at my two copies of "Christmas with the Kranks" sitting on the shelf that I bought at a garage sale recently and thinking about how much I am going to enjoy watching that movie on repeat this winter. 😜
--My new counselor telling me that she does EMDR, which is something I had searched Google for in the last couple of months, hoping that it could help me.
--Working on a new piano song that is so peaceful and beautiful. I will definitely play it as a musical number in church when I'm ready.
--Getting an awesome deal on a gift for Brooklyn's birthday, because why wouldn't a great deal make me smile?! 😆
--Crossing the parking lot in front of a car that waved me across to put away my shopping cart, only to realize when I was walking back that I was parked right next to one. I looked awesome. 🤣
--My friend having an appointment with my same hormone specialist and switching me days so I can get in earlier.
--Finishing the CUTEST little crocheted bear. Something about creating brightens my world.
--Little moments of progress, like feeling my appetite coming back and seeing my weight return or conquering more moments of anxiety.
I'm winning, friends. Little by little, I'm winning, and it feels so good.
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