Some people who know me and know about this struggle have asked how I have been doing since moving. And when they've asked, I've been fine that day or hour or minute, so I haven't thought to tell about the other days and nights filled with tears and prayers and talks with my husband. That's one of the confusing things about depression. I can be just fine one minute, thinking that maybe the depression wasn't real or wasn't as bad as I thought it was in the moment, and then crying the next. And when I'm struggling again, it seems like it's been forever, like I never actually felt well and will never feel well again.
One thing I've been so thankful for recently is the fact that we may have uprooted our whole lives and experienced so much change in the last month, but we're together as a family doing it. I don't have to do this alone, and I find so much comfort and joy in having the most important people in my life right here where I need them to be. I can get through another dark winter knowing that I have my family to love me through it.