Happy Mom

If I had to say the one thing I’ve been the most insecure about in the last several years, it’s hands down my ability as a mom. I’m not a super mom by any means, I don’t do creative or artistic things with my kids very often, I don't like baking any more than I have to, and to be completely honest, I don’t really like imaginary playing. 5 minutes is about my max. Sometimes, we watch way too much TV or I tell my kids to go play because I need my own time.

As you can probably imagine, Mother’s Day has not been my favorite holiday during these years. Hearing message after message about the divine role of mothers or praising the efforts of moms often left me thinking, “If only they knew what I’m like as a mom, they would never say those things about me.” In some of my more depressed years, I even found it easier to tell myself that I just wasn’t a good mom, and that somehow lessened the guilt and worry about my efforts.

But recently, I’ve been trying, really REALLY trying to focus on being the mom I am, not the mom that someone else is. I’ve realized that I can be so encouraging and supportive of the moms who do really fun things with their kids or who seem to fit the role of motherhood so naturally, while at the same time being happy with who I am as a mom. I’ve concentrated on doing what I’m good at or what makes me happy as a mom with my kids, and it has made a world of difference to me. I’ve recognized that I love working with my kids doing chores around the house, I love taking my kids on adventures and trying to take pictures that capture their unique personalities, and I love helping them nurture their own creativity.

I’m not a perfect mom, but I don’t really want to be. Instead, I want to be a happy mom, and little by little, I'm getting there.