Lessons Learned

 Five years ago this month, I began to experience drastic swings between depression and anxiety. Five long years. It seems like a lifetime some days, especially recently as I'm still fighting to find stability again. But if there are two important things I've learned in the last five years, it's this:

1) How to say "no" when needed to protect my mental health (and not feel bad about it)

2) How to ask for help

The second one comes with a little story. In July of 2017, my brain had been sick with these mood swings for 9 long, hard months. I came home from an incredibly difficult day at church and cried to Kyle, "It has been 9 months and I still don't know how to handle this." What he replied has stuck with me ever since. He said, "What do you mean you don't know how to handle it? Of course you know how to handle it. You know that you need to ask for help." My whole mindset changed that day. I realized that I didn't have to handle this sometimes debilitating sickness on my own, because I could ask for help. That was how I could get through it.

And that is precisely how I have gotten through the last five years. I've found my people and asked for help when I've needed it. And then when I've gotten back to a place of stability, I have tried to be on the giving end.

I may not be thankful for the struggles I've had with my mental health, but these two lessons feel invaluable to me, and I'm thankful to have been able to learn them.