When I got home from the second time of being in the hospital, my whole life felt like it was laying before me in a million shattered pieces. I still wasn't feeling well at all, and I hardly knew where to start in trying to put my life back together. So Kyle and I made a list. We called it our "puzzle pieces," each piece outlining some part of my life that I hoped I could get back at some point. We knew that it would take time, effort, patience, and lots of little baby steps before I could feel that my old life was restored, but it felt good to get all of these pieces written down. After getting home from my third hospital stay, I was feeling so much better than before and was really ready to start getting to work on the puzzle of my life. Some parts were easy to add back in at that point like eating, being at home by myself, and taking care of my kids. Others were more difficult like doing my hobbies again (crocheting, photography, piano), grocery shopping, making dinner, or making commitments. And one (doing our family's budget) I just started yesterday, nearly two months after getting home.
Through it all, I've learned that healing and progress are not linear. Sometimes I still have some rough days and Kyle has to make dinner or help more with the kids, but overall, my puzzle is coming together quite nicely. I'm going to be so proud of this one when it is finished.
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