I'm writing this to update everyone at once, since I am exhausted and in great pain, and since many people have asked me to tell them how things went today.
Today I went to a psychiatrist to get the help I need. The fact that I'm admitting this out in the open shows just how far I've come in not being ashamed of mental illness (since there really is nothing to be ashamed of!) While at my appointment, I was given the probable diagnosis of rapid cycling bipolar disorder, with a follow-up of a complete physical exam to rule out any other physical conditions, such as a thyroid disorder. I have had many suspicions about bipolar disorder in the last few weeks, and I find hope and healing in finally having my questions answered and my concerns validated.
I will be able to have a Gene Site done soon which will allow the doctors to know for sure what is going on and what medications will best help alleviate my pain by swabbing the inside of my mouth. Isn't that so cool?! I'm so thankful for the technology of our day that allows us to receive more help than ever before possible.
This is the hardest thing I've ever been through, especially because it seems as though the random shaking has thrown my back out of place and my back is in an awful "s" curve now. I've never experienced so much physical, mental, and emotional pain, but I've also never felt like I've seen the goodness of others and God's hand in my life so much as I do now. I'm literally being strengthened and uplifted through what would otherwise seem impossible to me.
I know this isn't very detailed, but I need to rest my back and my mind. I will explain more later. Thanks for all the love and support. I am one blessed girl!